Saturday, 1 February 2014

A statistically modelled wedding: Ruth Alexander

Planning a wedding is never a piece of cake. It is one hell of a task to do! 

Ruth Alexander of BBC News in today's piece observed that, "It's the classic dilemma for anyone planning a wedding. The list of friends and family you'd like to invite is seemingly endless. Your budget is not, and neither is the venue's floor space. Could one couple have found a solution via statistical modelling?"

Damjan Vukcevic and Joan Ko, applied a statistical model in planning their wedding in Melbourne, Australia. According to Ruth, "........ alhough the model was wrong, they still had just the right number of guests." 

Read the full article:

Cut the grass in your life and reveal the snakes

Life is like a grass. In life there are many snakes in human skin that hide under your grass. When you cut the grass in your life low, all the snakes hiding under the grass in your life will be exposed. They will have no hiding place but reveal their true colors. Letting the grass to grow tall will only help to conceal the snakes and provide them with a habitation. When the grass is blossomy green, you will not see their true colors. The snakes take over your grass at your expense. Cut them off the root and they will reveal themselves!

Every parasite needs a host to feed on. Your life is succulent, that’s why they (sycophants) stick around you. You are relevant to them until you run out of nutriment that attracts them. Their loyalty is transient; it has expiry date. Put their loyalty in check and their servile obedience ceases to exist. Sycophants terminate their loyalty when their true colors are revealed!

Life is all about choices. The choices you make in life determine your experience and vice versa. The card life deals you on the table is a reflection of your choices. If you turn over the card and you do not like the face of the card, you have got an option to put the card back into the pack and pick the card with the face that you like. Your life choices are too precious to be compromised. If you compromise, the value of the cards in your hands may not win you the pool!

Life is like a boat ride; not everyone is needed on the boat. You only need a limited number of people on the ride. The fewer the people on your boat are, the merrier and easier your ride becomes. But when your boat is filled with many people, it is most likely to sink. Your boat ride will end up a bummer!

Every life comes with a purpose. Every life has a bottom-line. Find your purpose in life (if you have not); and let your purpose guide your life choices. Define your bottom-line; and let your bottom-line inform your life choices.

I stepped into the new month with these thoughts. I hope they inspire you!

Thursday, 30 January 2014

Compartment of life; placing life in compartments

I have spent a considerable amount of time thinking about life and its essence. No matter how hard I try to decipher life I cannot think enough. Life is full of fun in shades of colour; hence it should be lived in full. That is one of my philosophies of life! Most times when we look at ourselves in the mirror we easily notice how much we have grown in physical realm. Less notice is made of what goes beyond our physical appearance. We oftentimes fail, unconsciously, to notice how much we have grown or failed to grow inwardly as persons. It is most popular that people focus more attention on outward appearance than on inward appearance. Thus our inward life exists as a sterilized version of the life we live on the outside. Insidiously, the life on the inside dies. This is somewhat responsible for the kind of life most people live today which I have found unappealing and wish to share my thoughtful ideas with you.

I live life the way good conscience tells me is the best for me. I have met a lot people; different characters; who lead their lives for others. When you see them they look good, pretentiously, on the outside, but on the inside they are devastated. A lot of people live a life of validation- they want to be accepted by everybody, so they cannot live without other people’s approval or opinion. They give others emotional access to their lives; hence they live in other people’s pocket, where they see the world through the lens of others. They twist image of themselves in order to fit into other people’s mosaic. They lack the mind of their own. They strive to satisfy everyone while they are emotionally harried. They buckle under other people’s tension to change who they are, not because it is desirable for them to change, but because others want them to. They lose the unique molds that make them whole just to fit into other people’s model. They end up being clay such that you pour a skosh of water on them and they topple. They become fickle images in other people’s imagery.

You may have seen those kinds of people. You may be one of them. I am not persuaded by the gross sycophancy such a life portrays. I am worried by the futility it suggests. Frankly, you do not need a life of validation to associate with other people. You do not need to give people emotional access to your life for them to accept you. You do not have to blend with everybody for you to display how gregarious you are. You really do not need to live your life in someone’s pocket because you want to be accepted by everybody. You do not need everyone around you to lead a happy life. All you need is compartment of your life. That’s my other philosophy of life I want to share with you!

Compartment of life is a philosophy I have imbibed over the years. It is a personal decision (because it is according to your viewpoint) you can adopt. It is informed by the complexities of coping with every Tom, Dick, and Harry.  It is a coping mechanism. It is a refutation of highfalutin rules of validation of life that has enslaved many people. Compartment of life does not endorse separatism; it is in consonant with the primacy of the inseparable nature of spiritual rule of life that advocates for togetherness and indivisibility of societies; and its advocacy validates the necessity of living a fulfilling life. Compartment of life is not persuaded by the rhetoric of interpersonal relationships. You can compartmentalize your life and still maintain healthy relationships with others. It believes in the notion that everybody deserves distinct places in your life. Not everybody or everything can fit into your life. And you cannot fit into everybody’s life too.

Life is like an edifice with a single room. Everything cannot be contained in that single room. You partition the room to create several rooms in order to put things in order. Without such partition disorder is most likely to happen, as objects will be littered haphazardly. Imagine your clothes are placed in the kitchenette? Imagine your kitchenwares are placed on your futon or mattress? Imagine your dishes are placed in the lavatory? Imagine your toiletries are placed in the refrigerator? Imagine your shoes are placed on your lounger? Things need to be placed in their ideal places. With such partition complementary objects- objects that complement themselves- are placed in the same room, while opposing objects- objects that cannot mingle are placed in a different room. Such partition makes every object in the room fall in with each other, and the room quite habitable. You can picture life in those scenarios. That single room applies to your life. You can imagine how chaotic life will be in those situations.

Life is multifaceted. It is hard to blend everything or all the people you love. You are better off dividing your lives into different compartments, giving each person a specific compartment in your life and assigning values to each person. Their values are signified by the magnitude of the compartments you reserve for them. This is perception against reality. Perception does not always reflect reality. When you compartmentalize your life you will not have to yield much space to those who deserve little and vice versa; you will not have to give emotional access to your life to others who treat you less of a human being; and you will not need to feed anybody’s personality to get accepted by all.

Compartment of life may not seem like a piece of cake, but it can be quite easy if well-thought-out. The essence of compartment of life is to reduce your relationship confusions and to install orderliness in your life. It does not suggest hate. It could rather mean you are letting people go. It means you are appropriately placing people or things where they belong. Even in the corporate world, organizations have different types of employees- workplace warriors; management mavericks; intrapreneurs; and entrepreneurs- each with its attendant values, and they do not all get along. They understand and respect their boundaries. Thus compartment of life is for your own comfort level. It gives you the unusual power to take control of your life. You are a single soul, so you cannot accommodate everybody in your life and you cannot fit into their lives no matter how you try to validate your life for them. Take control of yourself and your time with compartment of life and you will be marveled at how transformed your life will become.
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