Saturday, 30 December 2017

Happy New Year's Eve and Have a Stress-free New Year

When I take a stock of how the year 2017 went, three things stand out for me. First is how much I have learnt and grown in I-don’t-give-a-fuck-about-opinions space. When I say that I don’t give a fuck about opinions people tend to misunderstand that. What I mean is that I don’t pay attention to what other people think of me or what they think I should do or not do or who they think I should become or not become. Views on those things are preserved to me. Similarly, such views as they relate to you are preserved to you alone. It is crazy how people want to be the author of your biography when they can’t even draft a preface of their own life. Life is like a painting project. People tend to have opinions about how the mosaic of your life should be constructed. But it is only you that have the ultimate power to design the canvas on which your life’s image is painted. I am fascinated by how much I didn’t let other people’s opinions filter any decisions I made in the course of the year. No doubts, the year 2017 was a hard year in all fronts, yet I am grateful for all the lessons the process of going through those hard times thought me. I have fallen in love with the process that leads to any outcome. I love the tenacity I have demonstrated in that don’t-give-a-fuck space. If it works for you, don’t get rid of it. I can’t wait to deploy more of it in 2018, but with a positive mind-set though! 

Second is how much I have explored my intuition. This year was the first year I had ever relied solely on my intuitive mind. I knew I had so much power stored in that space, but I have not really allowed my intuitive mind to guide the process of my being. Indeed, everybody has the power of intuition inherent in them. But most times we tend to ignore the tiny voice of our intuitive mind telling us to do this or not to do that. I didn’t have to read any book on how to explore my intuitive mind or listen to any podcast on the power of intuition. I knew from my life experiences that each time I failed to listen to my intuition I would end up with the statement: I wish I had listened. So throughout the year 2017 I decided to pay attention to that “sacred gift”, as Albert Einstein calls it, my intuitive mind. It is amazing how my intuition has helped me to make the biggest, yet subtle decisions of my life in the course of the year. I wish everybody would pay attention to their intuitive mind and explore the power that it commands. It doesn’t matter to me whether those decisions ended up successful or not, because I am always wired to positivity, I always call myself a winner! 

Lastly, it is how much I have evolved as a person in the empathy space. No doubts, empathy is a very easy word to use, but clearly, not everyone has it. Empathy is, indeed, a scarce trait to find, particularly in today’s world where nobody gives a fuck about your feelings. I am intrigued by how much I am able to hold my own in-between two controversies in the mind - to empathize or not to empathize. It is difficult to reconcile the battle posed by these controversies. On the one hand, there is a voice telling you to show empathy regardless of whether it is deserved or not, because that’s how human beings should be naturally built. On the other hand is another voice telling you to show empathy only when it is deserved; hence you shouldn’t give a fuck about people’s feelings when they don’t deserve empathy. I am grateful to God for giving me the insight that empathy is not preserved to those whom we feel deserve it. I wish people would have that clear perception that empathy is a debt we owe each other, regardless of who is deserving of it or not. I know this is a bitter pill to swallow! 

As the year 2017 draws its curtains and we wrap up our journey for the year, here is my wish for you in the new year: “may you always live in a loving community where justice matters, where fairness and authenticity abounds and where the streets are filled with the joys of life, of learning, and of laughing (culled from the Handbook of community psychology, edited by J, Rappaport & E, Seidman 2012). 

Happy New Year and have a stress-free 2018 journey. 

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